the blank stare as a way of life

2006-12-31 17:15:33 -0800

Amidst the relative tranquility of rural Ohio during the winter, I realized that much of my genuine happiness relies on memory, imagination, and nostalgia. The problem with the majority of my leisure activities lately has been that they inhibit or dull my desire or ability to enjoy my own thoughts. Watching television is a prime example of this type of activity, and this is one of the primary reasons I decided never to own a television. Yet I've successfully subverted the intention behind that decision with things like DVD televideo, Netflix,, and Google video. Gaming and reading fiction have a similar effect, though not quite in the same way. After engaging in this type of activity, I will often feel lethargic, uninterested in more immediate aspects of my life, and reluctant to even attempt any type of creative endeavor. And sometimes this will last for days.

Now that I've recognized and acknowledged this about myself, I intend to reduce the amount of time I spend in pass-ivity, and to try to be more aware of the consequences of my inactions. This is one area where doing nothing really is better for me than just doing something, anything.